I often wonder if I am supposed to be doing something more with my life. Should there be more to my life besides working, playing , going out with friends, traveling, and spending money? I could get married, raise a few kids, and call it a life. Or I could continue this bachelor lifestyle of parties and the freedom to do what I want, when I want. Despite that freedom, however, it seems to be getting somewhat boring. Am I really ready to settle down?
Lately, I find myself coming home from work, sitting on the couch, and watching TV while I eat dinner. If there isn’t anything worth watching (and there usually isn’t), I head to the den and play around on the computer. Magazines are stacking up and I can’t remember the last time I opened a book to read for pleasure. Maybe I just need to get out of my rut. I have had the same job for four years, and haven’t made too much headway. I still live within 20 minutes of my job, just like I did when I first moved here. I sometimes feel like I’m getting dumber every day. I’ve taken some graduate school courses to counteract this, and have even managed to apply to a program. But I don’t think I’m ready to crawl in a hole for 2 years while I work full time and study part time. And the fact that those guys didn’t accept me doesn’t help. Though I have goals for things I want to accomplish – learn about and create my own investment strategies , pursue a couple business ideas – I find that the motivation to do these things is somewhat lacking.
There are people so driven that they have no doubt they will achieve their goals. They find a way around or through the obstacles in their way. I’ve been lucky that I’ve been able to accomplish about every thing I’ve set my mind to – so far, anyway. I was pretty successful (academically, anyway) through high school and college. Since entering the real world, I’ve ventured into other aspects of life – socializing, athletics, and adventure. Now it’s a matter of digging deeper to find that motivation when it really counts. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life working, having nothing to show for it. There’s too much to do and see to spend the next 40 years behind a desk.
I don’t want to follow the same path so many before me have taken. I want to set my own course. I expect more from myself than to follow the path society lays before me. Sure, getting married and raising a family is a very real possibility, but I don’t want to fall into the same mind-numbing suburban existence to which so many are accustomed.
So what am I going to do? It’s time to take the initiative and teach myself new things. It’s time to set and actually work towards achieving my goals. It’s time to take some risks and make things happen.